I do not consider myself old but in all my years of existence, I have gone through so many things I could probably write a book not less than 300 pages. Some things have made me cry, others have taught me a lesson, others have just made me tougher. But if I come to think about it, am I really as tough as I thought I was? Or maybe that is just the fantasy I created in my head because for a long time I have considered myself a strong and independent lady.
I know by now you are wondering what I am really talking about. Calm down we are not even halfway there. This is just the beginning. You might as well want to grab something. For the foodies out there like me, feel free to grab a snack or tea or coffee. Whatever suits you best.
I have always found myself writing down my thoughts and emotions in my journal when they become too much for me to handle. I end up feeling better for a couple of minutes but that pain never goes away. It’s like it has been engraved with a very deep ink in my soul like a tattoo.
I have been told before that I am a very bubbly person. I mean I love socializing so that hasn’t been hard for me. Considering most of my friends have a way of making me laugh in the middle of our conversations (shout out all my humorous friends.) Although, I don’t think I have friends who aren’t funny otherwise they wouldn’t be my friends.
But after the laughter, I am all alone in a very dark place. I do not think I can really find the right words to explain this to you very well. I mean I do not consider myself sad and boring because I love my own company. You know those people who can stay in the house for a whole week alone, with food of course, and a couple of movies and series. I am those people!
For the past few days I have been reading and watching some material on mental health. Not because I think I have a problem, but because I think it has become a menace that needs to be addressed. A lot of people have a lot of things bottled up and one day it just explodes on you and that is when reality hits you like; hol’ up, am I really okay? Do I need any sort of help by any chance? Do I need to talk to someone? And if I do, will I feel any better?
I started by saying I write a lot and I feel like that is where I am headed at this point. So I will leave part one here. Stay tuned for part two.
SIMPLY JOJO 